A Second Chance for the Pregnant Widow (Preview)

Chapter One

Though the sun was high in the sky over the small farmhouse in Driftwood, Missouri, the air was already starting to feel the first chill of the coming fall of 1867. A sure sign that the winter would likely bring frigid temperatures. Soon, Cassidy’s knit shawl wouldn’t be enough to keep her warm, but she didn’t have time to think about that.

There was still far too much to do before nightfall. She was already falling behind; she couldn’t afford to let any more fall by the wayside or she would never be able to get everything done by winter.

She squeezed her eyes shut, fighting against another wave of dizziness as it washed over her. She needed to focus on something else. She turned her focus to the only other person in the drafty barn.

“Thank you again for coming by to help out,” she said, looking up from the cow she was milking to where her friend Mae was taking care of the goats. In her mid-twenties, Mae was a few years older than Cassidy, her curly red hair and freckles a striking contrast to Cassidy’s chestnut brown.

Mae shook her head, a few of those glossy curls slipping out of the low bun she tried to lock them in. “Think nothing of it. What kind of friend would I be if I left you to struggle on your own? But you should really think about doing something to keep from getting so behind again long term.”

“Like what? There’s only so much work I can do in a day,” she said with a halfhearted laugh, wiping her hands on her stained apron.

“That’s exactly what I’m worried about. Perhaps if you hired on some help.”

Cassidy looked away, shaking her head as she got up and moved on to the next cow. “I can’t afford to hire on help.”

“Surely things can’t be that dire,” Mae frowned. “David was the town sheriff, not some poor farmer. He must have left you something.”

“According to the lawyers, there was nothing for him to leave, just this farm, and at the rate things are going, it might not be long before I lose that too.”

“How? What happened?” Mae asked, looking up from what she was working on to give her friend her full attention.

“I told you, he didn’t leave much money behind, and my column hardly brings in an income I can live off of. The bills are starting to pile up and I’m making myself sick from all the worry.”

“How much do you need?”

Cassidy shook her head rather than answering. “It’s not worth talking about.”

“I can understand why you don’t want to talk about it, but if you told me then perhaps Jacob could help you come up with a plan. Even if you don’t have money, you have this farm. There has to be a way to make it turn a profit.”

“Like what?”

“Like, you could trade one or two of your goats for some sheep and sell the wool or even spin it yourself. You know how.”

“I do, but I don’t think I have enough time for that.”

“You could post a listing in town looking for some mending you could take in or write letters for people in town.” Then she paused for a moment.

“What is it?” Cassidy asked, her curiosity spurred. “Do you have another idea?”

“I do, and I think it would work, but I don’t know if you’re going to like it.”

“I’d still like to hear it.”

“Take some of your writing to the local paper. Show them what else you can do.”

Cassidy shook her head. “I already have my column. It’s more than enough for me. I’m not suited to writing much else.”

“We both know that isn’t true. If you only tried—”

“I appreciate your confidence in me, really, but can you please drop this for now. I—” Another wave of dizziness washed over Cassidy, cutting off her words as she pressed a hand to her head.

“Are you alright?” Mae dropped what she was doing and ran to her friend’s side.

“I’m fine, only a little dizzy. This has been happening every now and then. I told you I haven’t been feeling well. I think it’s the stress. It’s letting up now. You don’t need to worry.”

Mae didn’t look convinced, so Cassidy knew she had to show her friend she was fine. The last thing she wanted to do was worry Mae more than she already had.

“I’m fine, really. You don’t need to worry about me.” Then she got to her feet. And that was a mistake.

Another wave of dizziness washed over her; this one far worse than the last. Dark spots danced in front of her vision. Her legs wobbled under her, causing her to stumble back a few steps.

Mae placed a steadying hand on her arm. “This doesn’t seem like it’s just stress.”

“I told you; it’s nothing.”

“Let’s get you inside and then maybe you can tell me how you’re really feeling.”

Cassidy was too out of sorts to do anything but let her friend lead her from the barn and into the small farmhouse on the property. Mae wrapped an arm around her shoulders, helping her along.

“It’s alright. I can walk just fine on my own,” she tried to insist, but Mae wasn’t having any of it.

“That might be true, but if you’re wrong and you fall it’s only going to make things worse. I would rather help you then risk it.”

It wasn’t a far walk, not more than thirty feet from the brown barn to the small blue house, but each step felt like it required her to cross miles.

Finally, they stepped inside, and Mae helped her sit down on the well-loved rocking chair on the front porch before pressing a hand to her forehead.

“You don’t feel like you have a fever.” She stepped back with a frown. “What other symptoms have you been having?”

“Nothing serious, just the dizzy spells and a little bit of nausea. I haven’t been able to keep much down lately if I’m honest,” she confessed.

Mae knit her brow. “Hmm. I’m sorry to ask this… it’s such a personal question, but when was your last monthly?”

Cassidy flushed, looking away. “Why do you ask?”

“I don’t want to alarm you, but these are the symptoms of pregnancy that my mother told me to look out for before Jacob and I got married.”

“Pregnant? But David is gone. I can’t be pregnant.”

“Have you had your cycle since you lost him?”

“No, I haven’t, but they have always been irregular at best. Sometimes I can go a few months without one.”

Mae looked concerned. “I think that might be the exact reason that you need to keep track of these symptoms. Do you want to go see the midwife when we go into town? Perhaps she could answer some questions for you, help figure this out?”

“No,” Cassidy said a bit too quickly. “Thank you, but no.”

Mae sighed. “Alright, I won’t push it for now, but will you at least agree to get some rest for the moment while I take care of some of the things around the farm for you?”

“I couldn’t ask you to do that,” Cassidy insisted, shaking her head.

“You’re not asking. I’m offering. Please, take me up on it. You’ve been working so hard, and you could clearly use a break.”

Cassidy hesitated. It felt wrong to throw all her work onto her friend, but it had been so long since she had taken more than a few minutes to herself. After she lost David, it seemed like there was always a never-ending string of chores.

“I don’t mind,” Mae added, shaking her head. “In fact, I would be upset if you refused my help.”

“Alright,” Cassidy relented, “But don’t push yourself too hard or do too much.”

“You don’t need to worry. I know my limits. I only wish that you knew yours.”

When Mae headed back outside, it gave Cassidy a moment to think. What if Mae was right? Could it be possible?

The idea that she could be pregnant felt almost absurd. David passed away almost three months ago. Surely, if she were pregnant, she would have known that by now.

Cassidy shook her head. She would worry about that later. She had more pressing matters to worry about first, mainly how to keep the farm.

For the moment, she should just focus on feeling better so that she could get back out there to help Mae. It wasn’t right to make her friend do the work of maintaining her farm. She would only close her eyes for a second. She didn’t need to sleep. She just wanted to rest her eyes for a moment.

“Cassidy,” Mae called to her softly, pulling her from her rest.

She opened her eyes, blinking away sleep. “I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to drift off. Just let me get up and I can go out and help you with whatever is left.”

“There’s no need for that. I was able to get everything finished up.” She beamed. “Besides, if you were tired enough to fall asleep just sitting here then you probably needed the rest. How are you feeling?”

She pushed away the guilt at Mae having to finish up her work and smiled. She knew Mae would only insist it was no trouble and that she was more than happy to help however she could. “I’m feeling a bit better. Thank you for taking care of things. It really means a lot to me.”

“You know I’m always happy to help.” Mae hesitated. “Are you still feeling up to going into town today?”

Cassidy thought for a moment. The truth was she was still exhausted. All she wanted to do was fall into bed and sleep for at least a week. She knew if she told Mae she wasn’t feeling up to going into town, she would respect her choice and let the others know. No one would be upset with her, but it still felt like she would be letting them all down if she said she wasn’t up to going to the Women’s Meeting.

They meant so much to everyone involved, including herself.

Her answer was clear. “You don’t need to worry. I can handle going into town for a bit,” she smiled.

“Are you sure?” she pressed, visibly worried about her friend. “You still seem a bit drained.”

Cassidy waved her off, giving her the best smile she could offer. “I’m fine. You don’t need to worry so much. Besides, it will be nice to see everyone again. It isn’t like we get a chance to do this every day.”

“No, but we do get to do this every week. They would understand if you needed to sit one out.”

“No, I want to go, and the meetings have been a lot less frequent since David passed away.” They had missed a whole month of meetings when Cassidy first got the news of his death a few months earlier. Cassidy had been too busy with the funeral arrangements, then dealing with the lawyer. Sometimes it seemed like the meetings were the only thing left in her life that offered a sense of normalcy. To emphasize just how much she wanted to go, she pushed herself to her feet. “I’m alright, Mae, see.”

For a moment, Mae looked like she was going to argue, but then she just shook her head and smiled. “Alright then, I’ll give you a few minutes to get ready then we can go.”

Once Mae left her alone, Cassidy headed into the bedroom she once shared with her husband. There wasn’t much time, so she quickly changed out of her work dress into a clean one and rewrapped her long braid back around her head, pinning it in place before the two of them headed from the house.

The Woman’s Group at the local Methodist church was Cassidy’s pride and joy. Part of her had been surprised when David gave her the go-ahead to start organizing it, though she figured it must look good on paper to have his wife leading a program at the local church.

Of course had he realized just what the group was, she doubted he would have been quite as supportive.

He, like most of the town, thought it was nothing more than a worship group, there to read the Bible together and organize charity events, which wasn’t quite true. Of course, that wasn’t to say they didn’t do any of that, but it wasn’t the primary function.

The second they stepped through the doors, the ten or so women that were waiting came over to greet them with warm, pleasant smiles.

“It’s good to see you all again,” Cassidy said, feeling stronger just being in their presence. “It looks like everyone is here so why don’t we all take our seats, and we can get started.”

A short time later, Cassidy found herself in her usual spot at the front of the room, leading the women’s group meeting as she read from an article from the paper about Elizabeth Cady Stanton’s current list of places she would be going to give talks.

Marsha, a bold older woman sighed. “I only wish that she would come a bit closer to Driftwood. I would love to be able to go see her.”

“It’s just a shame that we’re off in the middle of nowhere, but I would love to see one of her talks too,” another added.

“Even without her visiting, there’s still plenty we can do in our own town to help further women’s issues,” Cassidy said.

“You always know how to find ways we can improve our own community,” Anne, a young lady of barely sixteen, cut in. “If it wasn’t for you, we wouldn’t even have this group and, while I can’t speak for everyone, I wouldn’t even know how to read if you hadn’t been willing to teach me.”

Cassidy smiled at her young pupil. “It was nothing. I only wish I could have met you sooner. In this day and age, there’s no reason that we haven’t gotten to a point where everyone should be taught to read. Someday perhaps we’ll get our own schoolhouse… but as long as I live here, I’m happy to teach anyone who wants to learn.”

From there the conversation shifted to what else they can do to help the women of the little town they all called home.

When the meeting ended, she headed home and fell into bed, exhausted from the day, but as she lay there, sleep seemed like a distant hope.

Her mind was racing far too fast for her to hope that she would drift off. Her hand moved to her stomach as she turned over Mae’s words over in her head. It couldn’t be possible, could it? Could she really be pregnant?

Not to mention, if she was, how could she expect to cope? She was already struggling to manage all of the commitments she already had.

There were days when it felt like she could barely manage to take care of herself. The very idea of bringing a helpless infant into the situation made her heart pound. None of that even got into the fact that she wouldn’t be able to work when she got close to giving birth or right after.

She could only hope that Mae was wrong, but somewhere inside of her she couldn’t ignore the possibility.

Chapter Two

The dining hall of the boarding house Austin was staying in was loud and crowded, but it was affordable, and it was better than roughing it in the forest. He’d gotten in so late the night before that he’d almost missed dinner. He was only staying there overnight before continuing on to his destination… the small mining town of Driftwood, Missouri which was only a day’s ride away. That said, it had been a long journey to make on an empty stomach, and he couldn’t ignore the siren call of the ham and sausage the landlady had made for breakfast.

“Are you sure you don’t want to stay a little longer?” she asked when he brought his plate back to her. “There’s a storm due soon. It wouldn’t change your pace all that much to wait for it to pass.”

He shook his head. “Thank you for your concern, ma’am, but I need to get on the road as soon as possible.”

She sighed. “At least you stayed for breakfast. Did you get enough to eat? You were positively ravenous last night when you came in.”

“I had been on the road for a long time before I stopped here,” he said sheepishly, rubbing the back of his head. “It was the first hot meal I had a chance to enjoy in a few days. I hope I didn’t eat more than my fair share.”

The land lady was having none of that. “You came in so late there was no one else waiting to get any food. I was only worried that there wasn’t enough left for you to get your fill.”

“It was more than enough, especially with breakfast today. I’m sure it’ll be enough to keep me going for many miles.”

She frowned but didn’t push. “Just make sure to ride safely, and feel free to turn back if the storm gets to be too much for you. The paths get slippery in the rain once you start to get close to Driftwood, and there’s all manner of animals in those woods, especially snakes at this time of year. I’ve seen a lot of horses run off because of them.”

“Then it’s a good thing I’m going out during the rain. That should be enough to keep them away while I ride.”

She sighed but didn’t argue with him any further.

He shot her a last smile then went back to his room. It was kind of her to be so concerned, but there was too much waiting in Driftwood for him to linger any longer than he had to. Once in his room, he started to gather up his things. He hadn’t brought much with him, but when he came to the letter that inspired this journey in the first place, he paused. It wasn’t much on the surface, just a business letter that was likely written up by some overworked and underpaid secretary if its brief and brisk nature was anything to go by, but that was part of what made it seem so strange in the first place.

Even though he was in a rush, he gave in to the urge to pause for a moment, opening the letter and reading it over once more.

Dear Grant family,

We at the Union Pacific Railway Company have the unfortunate task of informing you of the death of Beau Grant. He perished in an accident at our mines.

Our condolences,

Union Pacific Railway Company

It was so detached, indifferent, almost curt in its delivery. He couldn’t help but think back to the day Beau had gotten the news he had been hired by them.

It came not long after Beau had graduated from engineering college. Always known for being bright and a hard worker, no one in the Grant family was surprised when he graduated at the top of his class with high honors.

They’d been in their kitchen. It wasn’t anything fancy, but despite its simple furnishings, it was always filled with the love and laughter that seemed to permeate every inch of his family’s small ranch house and the surrounding farmland they maintained. He and his older brother were helping his mother clean up from breakfast. Austin was at the wash basin, drying the dishes while Beau washed them up, when their little sister, Mary, came racing in with the mail.

She eagerly bounded over to Beau, her straw blond braid swinging behind her. “It looks like this one is for you!” she exclaimed, holding one of the letters out to him, looking so excited Austin worried that she might bounce right out of her skin.

A look of nervousness came across Beau’s face as he looked over the envelope, drying his hands before taking it from her. He ran one of his hands through the wavy dark hair both brothers shared.

Beau looked to his family with hopeful apprehension on his sharp face. “It’s from the Union Pacific Railway Company.”

Austin lit up in excitement for his brother. “That’s the one you haven’t been able to stop talking about since you sent the application in last month, isn’t it?”

“Yes, it is,” Beau responded, eyes locked on it like it held the secrets to the universe. “Don’t get me wrong. I love being here at the ranch, but this is my chance to get out in the world and do something that has the potential to make a huge difference in people’s lives. This rail line is going to connect the world like never before, and I have a chance to be a part of it, a chance to help shape it.”

His mother had smiled at him. “We know how much this means to you, and even if it means you have to live far from us, we all want you to live your dreams. Lord knows we’ve never had much, but your Pa and I always believed working hard and book-learning can help you do anything you set your mind to. That’s why we put so much work into giving you the best chances that we could.” She nodded to the envelope still clenched in his hands. “Go on and open it. We know how long you’ve been waiting to hear back from them, and we sure can’t wait to celebrate.”

Beau grimaced, shaking his head. “Don’t get too excited just yet. There’s no way to be sure that we’re going to be celebrating much of anything. What if they’ve rejected my application? I’ve only just graduated with my degree. They might want someone who’s more experienced.”

“If they rejected you, then they don’t deserve you,” their mother said, coming to stand beside Beau. “If that’s what’s happened, then we’re glad to have you keep staying with us as long as you need to. I’m sure Austin would be more than happy to have an extra pair of hands at the ranch for a little while longer. And if you need to, I’m sure you’ll find something else in no time. All that being said, I doubt that’s what’s happened. You might not have the most experience, but you had the highest marks in your year, and you wrote your final paper on the best ways to extend rail lines in the west. It might not be field experience, but you have plenty of relevant knowledge. You’ve been working towards this your entire life. Go on now. Open it and you’ll see that your ma always knows best.”

Austin watched his brother smile and tear it open. He read it over and a smile spread across his face. “I can’t believe it. I got the job!”

Their mother lit up while pulling him in for a hug. “I can. None of us ever doubted it. We’re so proud of you.”

The rest of that night had spent celebrating him and helping him prepare for his impending journey. It had been a happy occasion. Austin and the rest of the Grant family would miss Beau dearly, of course, but they were all so happy to see him getting to live the dream he had worked so hard to achieve. He’d always been the one of the two brothers who wanted to get out into the world and make something of himself, like he felt like he had to leave a mark. In so many ways, on the other hand, Austin was the polar opposite. All he wanted was to live a peaceful life on the ranch. Someday he would find a local girl, get married, have a few kids and keep working the family farm. Of course, he too had been well-educated. Learning was something his family placed great importance in, but Austin was a simple man who desired a simple life.

If not for what had happened next, he might never have left the sleepy little town where he’d been born.

Only a few months later, Austin and his family got word of Beau’s death. There were hardly any details in the letter. All it said was that there was an accident. Beau was a smart man, known for being rather cautious so something about it hadn’t set right with Austin or the rest of his family.

With a sigh, he sat down at the small writing desk in the room and began to pen a letter to his family.

My dearest sister and mother,

Though I haven’t been gone long, I can’t help but feel it has already been far too long since I have seen the two of you, let alone since I’ve tasted Ma’s cooking. Has she made that roast beef of hers since I left? If so, I’m jealous.

I’m getting close to Driftwood. It shouldn’t be more than another day or two at most before I arrive. I’m hopeful that someone there will be able to give us the answers we’re hoping for.

I can’t wait to come back to you all. I’ll write again as soon as I can.

Missing you already,

Your brother and son,

Austin

He signed the letter, sealing it up before heading on his way. He dropped it off at the post office then got on his horse and set off in the direction of Driftwood.

Not long after he set off on the road, as predicted, the weather took a turn. Clouds darkened the sky so thickly that they seemed to block out the sun, casting everything in an eerie darkness. Then the rain started.

At first it was light and gentle, but it wasn’t long before it was coming down in heavy sheets, soaking Austin through to his bones.

A less determined man may have simply turned around and waited until after the storm to continue, but even as the lightning flashed in the sky, he didn’t slow his pace. He wasn’t about to let a little rain delay his pace.

Finally, the silhouette of a town could be seen through the mist. He knew from his map that if he just stayed on this path, it would take him straight to the center of town.

Seeing that was enough to convince him to double his efforts. If he just rode a little longer, he would finally be there. He clenched his jaw and pushed forward.

Even so, the journey grew harder with every step. The dirt trail was little more than a mud slide, making his horse struggle to keep his footing. The ever-growing mist and rain covered his face and blurred his vision.

Not to mention he was so tired he was struggling to keep his eyes open.

Sure, he had given in to his body’s needs and stayed in a boarding house last night, but on his weeklong journey, it was the only night he had done so, and he still forced himself from the bed far sooner than he would have liked.

The rest of journey, he simply found the softest patch of grass he could manage, laid out his bedroll and stole a few winks of sleep before getting back on the road.

Finding out the truth about what happened to his brother mattered far more than sleep. There would be time for that once he had answers.

He still remembered the look on his mother’s face when they received the news. It was less than a year since they had lost their father, and he had never seen her look so crushed. She did what she could to put on a strong front in front of him and Mary, but when the house was still and she thought everyone else was asleep, he heard the way she wept.

He knew there was no way he could make things go back to the way they were before. Nothing he did could ever bring his brother or father back, so he did the only thing he could do to help offer her and the rest of his family some form of closure. He packed up his things and journeyed out to try to get answers.

Suddenly, he was startled from his thoughts as his horse began to buck wildly, letting out a sharp neigh.

“Easy,” he muttered, trying to no avail to steady and calm the wild animal. Austin’s eyes darted to the trail where he immediately spotted what went wrong.

Racing across the trail was a large, dark brown snake.

The horse under him reared up. Austin tightened his grip on the reins, squeezing his legs around its waist, but it was no use. His strength was nothing when compared to that of a horse.

The beast easily threw him off its back.

Austin let out a startled cry, but it was far too late for him to stop it or try to soften his fall. He slammed to the ground and laid flat on his back.

The air was punched from his lungs as pain lanced through his body. He winced, trying to sit up, but he couldn’t make himself move. He knew that he needed to do something, that the startled horse was still raging. He needed to move fast, to calm the animal. He willed himself to stand to move, to do anything, but his body just felt too heavy.

It was like someone replaced all the blood in his body with lead, weighing him down, pinning him to the cold, wet ground as spots danced in his vision.

Even as he fought against it, his will was no match for his body, and he was soon swallowed by darkness.